Friday 6 September 2019
Funerals make death scarier.
Such a simple truth I should have seen. But I didn't get it - not until the past year. Not until I was mourning Desiree.
Nana's death was earth-shattering to me. But the sight of her body wasn't. She looked peaceful. She looked like my Nana. Like she had just fallen asleep.
But seeing my friends in their coffins, they looked unnatural. Like dolls of my friends. And that thought makes me retch and want to cry, to even write it down.
I will never see another wake again. I will only go to memorials from now on - but I will always send gifts to the funeral. Or, I will go if it seems like the bereaved needs the support from me. I will never let down a friend.
But for my deceased friends - I think it's far kinder and more loving to remember them as they were in life. Their dead body is not who they are....
I Love You All. I miss you all. :(*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
11:00AM (later) Note to self: https://www.cnet.com/pictures/24-unusual-things-you-can-clean-in-your-washer-besides-clothes/
Put coins in washer bags, put washer bags in washer with a big cleaning towel (raggedy lavender colored one).
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
3:19PM (later still)
Today's rug cleaning procedure:
1) First, I found a barbecue grill scrubbing brush (which was TOTALLY unsuited for barbecuing or being anywhere near food, considering that it regularly sheds thin steel bristles), and used it to scrub the heck out of the matted carpet. I was trying to make it fluffy again, making it easier to clean out the clinging gunk and free the dirt. I heard there's something called a carpet rake I'm supposed to use - I'd never heard of a carpet rake before today. Hopefully the brush I used was a good substitute. Don't know that I have money to buy a carpet rake...
https://www.hunker.com/13420057/how-to-re-fluff-matted-carpet
2) Next, I got an empty spray bottle (in this case, I used the final dregs of a green bottle of "Lysol All-Purpose Cleaner with Bleach" (my godmother's leftover cleaning supplies), and I filled the empty bottle with a) warm-hot tap water and b) a couple drops of "Ultra Joy Lemon Dishwashing Liquid" (my favorite for washing dishes by hand). Shook it up lightly - suds, but not explosions.
3) I sprayed the hot water and detergent mixture on the carpet. It turned a little white with the suds. Hopefully the same materials that are used to cut through grease on dishes will be able to cut through the greasy filth clinging to the carpet. Pretty sure I saw several wads of gum stuck to it, hidden by the stains.
4) Then I dabbed up the water ("as gently as you would clean your child's face") with a clean, dry rag (in this case, the cover for one of my godmother's old steam cleaners).
5) To help speed up the water drying out and to treat the smell a bit more, I next sprinkled baking soda down. The baking soda soaked up the water quickly and turned brown; I wiped and sort of scrubbed up the baking soda. Then vacuumed it a bit. Once I cleaned up the dirty layer of baking soda, I put down a fresh one. Covered it with a cleaning towel. My husband stepped on it before I could get the towel down. Totally left big muddy footprints all over it.
6) I left it alone for a few hours, then scrubbed a bit more to pick up the now-dirty-again baking soda and water.
7) My husband sprayed Febreeze all over the carpet. A half hour later, I sprinkled a bit of Listerine mouthwash on the carpet as well. Now it smells AH-MAY-ZING!!! :D
Let's see if it works! I'll look forward to doing this again tomorrow, until the carpet stops being a health hazard. Yep, I follow the stereotype of a messy mother totally overrun by her rather hyperactive child. And I don't mean that colloquially, either - my son really is diagnosed with ADHD. I didn't realize they made it official until his most recent doctor's appointment. No doubt, Kay will try to deny that the diagnosis is real, and my mother will compare him to me or to textbooks for a while until she understands that his best is different from everyone else's but that we meet him at HIS best... :). Anyway, now I have more research to do, so I can be the most supportive I can be to Logan. I will break that cycle - I will do everything I wish my own parents had done when they learned of my mental illnesses.
Such a simple truth I should have seen. But I didn't get it - not until the past year. Not until I was mourning Desiree.
Nana's death was earth-shattering to me. But the sight of her body wasn't. She looked peaceful. She looked like my Nana. Like she had just fallen asleep.
But seeing my friends in their coffins, they looked unnatural. Like dolls of my friends. And that thought makes me retch and want to cry, to even write it down.
I will never see another wake again. I will only go to memorials from now on - but I will always send gifts to the funeral. Or, I will go if it seems like the bereaved needs the support from me. I will never let down a friend.
But for my deceased friends - I think it's far kinder and more loving to remember them as they were in life. Their dead body is not who they are....
I Love You All. I miss you all. :(*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
11:00AM (later) Note to self: https://www.cnet.com/pictures/24-unusual-things-you-can-clean-in-your-washer-besides-clothes/
Put coins in washer bags, put washer bags in washer with a big cleaning towel (raggedy lavender colored one).
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
3:19PM (later still)
Today's rug cleaning procedure:
1) First, I found a barbecue grill scrubbing brush (which was TOTALLY unsuited for barbecuing or being anywhere near food, considering that it regularly sheds thin steel bristles), and used it to scrub the heck out of the matted carpet. I was trying to make it fluffy again, making it easier to clean out the clinging gunk and free the dirt. I heard there's something called a carpet rake I'm supposed to use - I'd never heard of a carpet rake before today. Hopefully the brush I used was a good substitute. Don't know that I have money to buy a carpet rake...
https://www.hunker.com/13420057/how-to-re-fluff-matted-carpet
2) Next, I got an empty spray bottle (in this case, I used the final dregs of a green bottle of "Lysol All-Purpose Cleaner with Bleach" (my godmother's leftover cleaning supplies), and I filled the empty bottle with a) warm-hot tap water and b) a couple drops of "Ultra Joy Lemon Dishwashing Liquid" (my favorite for washing dishes by hand). Shook it up lightly - suds, but not explosions.
3) I sprayed the hot water and detergent mixture on the carpet. It turned a little white with the suds. Hopefully the same materials that are used to cut through grease on dishes will be able to cut through the greasy filth clinging to the carpet. Pretty sure I saw several wads of gum stuck to it, hidden by the stains.
4) Then I dabbed up the water ("as gently as you would clean your child's face") with a clean, dry rag (in this case, the cover for one of my godmother's old steam cleaners).
5) To help speed up the water drying out and to treat the smell a bit more, I next sprinkled baking soda down. The baking soda soaked up the water quickly and turned brown; I wiped and sort of scrubbed up the baking soda. Then vacuumed it a bit. Once I cleaned up the dirty layer of baking soda, I put down a fresh one. Covered it with a cleaning towel. My husband stepped on it before I could get the towel down. Totally left big muddy footprints all over it.
6) I left it alone for a few hours, then scrubbed a bit more to pick up the now-dirty-again baking soda and water.
7) My husband sprayed Febreeze all over the carpet. A half hour later, I sprinkled a bit of Listerine mouthwash on the carpet as well. Now it smells AH-MAY-ZING!!! :D
Let's see if it works! I'll look forward to doing this again tomorrow, until the carpet stops being a health hazard. Yep, I follow the stereotype of a messy mother totally overrun by her rather hyperactive child. And I don't mean that colloquially, either - my son really is diagnosed with ADHD. I didn't realize they made it official until his most recent doctor's appointment. No doubt, Kay will try to deny that the diagnosis is real, and my mother will compare him to me or to textbooks for a while until she understands that his best is different from everyone else's but that we meet him at HIS best... :). Anyway, now I have more research to do, so I can be the most supportive I can be to Logan. I will break that cycle - I will do everything I wish my own parents had done when they learned of my mental illnesses.
posted by Yvea at 10:42 AM
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