So folks are saying Daniel's abusive.  They say I should leave him and find someone else.

Do they think I don't know that?

I do.  If it were that easy, I would.

I can't for two reasons:

1) I need to escape Kay.  In terms of Daniel or her, she's more abusive.  I can't get away from her.  I need his help to escape.

2) Even if/when I leave Daniel to seek a life free of abuse (if it ever becomes safe enough to leave, which it isn't right now), I already know what there is for me.  I'd be alone.  Daniel is the only man who has ever said yes.  I don't have endless prospects like other girls, for a very big reason: I'm mentally ill.  Even when I control my mental illness, it never goes away, and most guys rightly don't want to put up with that.

Daniel is very likely the only relationship I've ever had a chance of having.  I want to enjoy it for as long as I can.  I'm not ready to be alone for the rest of my life.

But when it's time, I know I'll be able to handle it.  I won't ever give up.

Or if I do... I'll finish it quickly.  No lingering pain for anyone.