Summer Sorrow Blog #1

Today is Tuesday 2 June 2020.

Depression is my constant companion, guilt the persistent understudy nipping at its heels.  It's summertime now.  It's warm outside, and I feel like I am not doing enough.

I just saw Lotta.  She wasn't friendly.  I think she is disappointed in me for neglecting the garden.

I need to go to the garden after class.  1:30pm, I must go.

There's a lot of stuff I haven't gotten done.  I don't want to go back to my abusive husband.  I need to do him this favor of setting him free and send him the divorce papers.  He will still blame me for this, but maybe that's how it should be.  Maybe that's how he'll let go and recover his sense of pride.

Kay is upset with me for not getting enough done.

I am shutting down emotionally.  And that effects me physically.

I would love to have a friend with benefits, but that's not something I can do right now.  Possibly not for a very long time.

Perhaps I would do better if I stop trying to connect with people.

I should make that video for Emilie.

Just do what I'm responsible for...